The Blocking Assignment Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
- Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.
92%POTENCY
-11.2PTS DRAINED
Group Chat FuneralVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A used challenge flag
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Goedert's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.