The Late Scratch Hex of Darren Waller
Darren Waller · CAR · TE
“Ref: "Number Waller, that's a flag." Waller: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Waller's week
- At 34, Waller is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
- Waller finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
82%POTENCY
-17.7PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Waller's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Chuba Hubbard
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Darren Waller in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Darren Waller is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Darren Waller actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.