The Hamstring Hex of Houston Texans
Houston Texans defense
“The Texans defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Houston Texans defense's week
- The Texans defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
- The Texans defense allows a 99-yard drive, a 71-yard punt return, and a trick play from the 1989 playbook.
77%POTENCY
-19.7PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Texans, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Kayshon Boutte
- Tank Dell
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse Houston Texans defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Houston Texans defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Houston Texans defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.