The Garbage-Time Hex of Philadelphia Eagles
Philadelphia Eagles defense
“The Eagles defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Philadelphia Eagles defense's week
- The Eagles defense lets a 4th-and-17 conversion happen. Then another. Then a trick play.
- The Eagles defense allows a 99-yard drive, a 71-yard punt return, and a trick play from the 1989 playbook.
78%POTENCY
-11PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Eagles, Eagles, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- DeVonta Smith
- Makai Lemon
- Dallas Goedert
- Eli Stowers
- Dontayvion Wicks
- Jake Elliott
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Indianapolis Colts
FAQ
How do I curse Philadelphia Eagles defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Philadelphia Eagles defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Philadelphia Eagles defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.