The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- A mysterious flag erases Goedert's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
- Goedert's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
90%POTENCY
-14.3PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Jaguars locker room
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Goedert's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.