The Chip-and-Release Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert gets "rested" in a week the team clinched nothing.
- Goedert gets a 40-yard pass, then immediately "adjusts his gloves" and is injured. Tragic.
90%POTENCY
-10.2PTS DRAINED
Group Chat FuneralVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single tear from a Steelers fan
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Goedert drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.