The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert spikes the ball in celebration at the 3-yard line. He was not in the end zone.” — Madame Waiver Wire
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.
- Goedert stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.
87%POTENCY
-14PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single Jaguars jersey, ironically worn
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A single tear from a Bengals fan
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Goedert drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.