The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- A mysterious flag erases Goedert's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
86%POTENCY
-10.9PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single tear from a Bears fan
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A single Patriots jersey, ironically worn
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Goedert, Goedert, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.