The Snap Count Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
- Goedert will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
75%POTENCY
-13.5PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Goedert's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.