The Chip-and-Release Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Goedert lines up as a tackle on 61% of snaps. A beautiful new career for him.
82%POTENCY
-17.1PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
Incantation
Eye of Vikings, tongue of ref,
Bring Eagles down to grief,
Goedert scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.