The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Dalton Schultz
Dalton Schultz · HOU · TE
“Schultz spikes the ball in celebration at the 3-yard line. He was not in the end zone.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Schultz's week
- Schultz is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.
- Schultz will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
80%POTENCY
-19.2PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
Incantation
Eye of Jets, tongue of ref,
Bring Texans down to grief,
Schultz scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Nico Collins
- Colston Loveland
- David Montgomery
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Dalton Schultz in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dalton Schultz is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dalton Schultz actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.