The Chip-and-Release Hex of Darren Waller
Darren Waller · CAR · TE
“At 34, Waller is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Waller's week
- Waller will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- A mysterious flag erases Waller's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
73%POTENCY
-13.1PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
Incantation
Waller, Waller, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Chuba Hubbard
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Darren Waller in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Darren Waller is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Darren Waller actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.