The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Darren Waller
Darren Waller · CAR · TE
“At 34, Waller is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Waller's week
- Waller is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Waller's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
72%POTENCY
-12.7PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- Powdered kicker confidence
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Waller's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Chuba Hubbard
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Darren Waller in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Darren Waller is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Darren Waller actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.