The Invisible Route Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- The broadcast shows Stowers on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.
- Stowers sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
88%POTENCY
-14.4PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Stowers drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.