The Blocking Assignment Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- A mysterious flag erases Stowers's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
- Stowers lines up as a tackle on 61% of snaps. A beautiful new career for him.
87%POTENCY
-15PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- Powdered kicker confidence
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Stowers's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.