The Late Scratch Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- Stowers is targeted on a 3rd-and-17 and gains exactly 16 yards. Punt. Cry.
- Stowers is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
80%POTENCY
-15.9PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Stowers drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.