The Invisible Route Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Stowers gets a 40-yard pass, then immediately "adjusts his gloves" and is injured. Tragic.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.
- Stowers is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
82%POTENCY
-12.2PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Stowers, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.