The Blocking Assignment Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Stowers gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Vanderbilt's biggest rival.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- Stowers sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- Stowers goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.
86%POTENCY
-15.3PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Stowers's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.