The Late Scratch Hex of Houston Texans
Houston Texans defense
“The Texans defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Houston Texans defense's week
- The Texans will give up a touchdown to a tight end who was a high school wrestler. Net -2 points.
- The Texans defense lets a 4th-and-17 conversion happen. Then another. Then a trick play.
83%POTENCY
-16.5PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Texans drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Kayshon Boutte
- Tank Dell
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse Houston Texans defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Houston Texans defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Houston Texans defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.