The Garbage-Time Hex of Houston Texans
Houston Texans defense
“The Texans defense gets a pick-six called back for a penalty on... the defense. In the end zone.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Houston Texans defense's week
- The Texans defense scores a tackle-for-loss. In the other team's highlight reel.
- The Texans defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.
81%POTENCY
-18.6PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Texans's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Kayshon Boutte
- Tank Dell
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse Houston Texans defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Houston Texans defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Houston Texans defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.