The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Houston Texans
Houston Texans defense
“The Texans defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Houston Texans defense's week
- The Texans defense scores a tackle-for-loss. In the other team's highlight reel.
- The Texans will give up a touchdown to a tight end who was a high school wrestler. Net -2 points.
83%POTENCY
-13.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A single Dolphins jersey, ironically worn
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Texans drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Kayshon Boutte
- Tank Dell
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse Houston Texans defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Houston Texans defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Houston Texans defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.