The Hamstring Hex of Houston Texans
Houston Texans defense
“The Texans defense is "bend, don't break" and then breaks every single time.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Houston Texans defense's week
- The Texans defense lets a 4th-and-17 conversion happen. Then another. Then a trick play.
- The Texans defense gets a pick-six called back for a penalty on... the defense. In the end zone.
75%POTENCY
-17.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Texans's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Kayshon Boutte
- Tank Dell
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse Houston Texans defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Houston Texans defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Houston Texans defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.