The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Alex Kessman
Alex Kessman · CAR · K
“Kessman sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Kessman's week
- The crowd chants "WIDE LEFT" for Kessman. Kessman does not ignore it. Neither does the ball.
- Kessman makes a 58-yarder... in pregame. Not counted.
80%POTENCY
-17.7PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- Powdered kicker confidence
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Kessman's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Alex Kessman in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Alex Kessman is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Alex Kessman actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.