The Blocking Assignment Hex of Brenden Bates
Brenden Bates · JAX · TE
“Bates catches 2 balls for 11 yards and a nice hug from a referee.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Ref: "Number Bates, that's a flag." Bates: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
- Bates is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.
81%POTENCY
-17.8PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Eye of Rams, tongue of ref,
Bring Jaguars down to grief,
Bates scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bhayshul Tuten
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Parker Washington
- Brian Thomas Jr.
FAQ
How do I curse Brenden Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brenden Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brenden Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.