The Hamstring Hex of Chicago Bears
Chicago Bears defense
“The Bears defense allows a 99-yard drive, a 71-yard punt return, and a trick play from the 1989 playbook.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Chicago Bears defense's week
- The Bears defense scores a tackle-for-loss. In the other team's highlight reel.
- The Bears defense generates 0 sacks, 0 turnovers and a lot of vibes.
83%POTENCY
-9.8PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- A single Rams jersey, ironically worn
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Bears's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Cairo Santos
- Miller Moss
- Zavion Thomas
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
FAQ
How do I curse Chicago Bears defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Chicago Bears defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Chicago Bears defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.