The Late Scratch Hex of Chicago Bears
Chicago Bears defense
“The Bears defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Chicago Bears defense's week
- The Bears defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.
- The Bears defense is "bend, don't break" and then breaks every single time.
80%POTENCY
-16.1PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
Incantation
Eye of Buccaneers, tongue of ref,
Bring Bears down to grief,
Bears scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Cairo Santos
- Miller Moss
- Zavion Thomas
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
FAQ
How do I curse Chicago Bears defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Chicago Bears defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Chicago Bears defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.