The Garbage-Time Hex of Chicago Bears
Chicago Bears defense
“The Bears defense gets a pick-six called back for a penalty on... the defense. In the end zone.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Chicago Bears defense's week
- The Bears defense scores a tackle-for-loss. In the other team's highlight reel.
- The Bears defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.
85%POTENCY
-10.2PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Bears's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Cairo Santos
- Miller Moss
- Zavion Thomas
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
FAQ
How do I curse Chicago Bears defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Chicago Bears defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Chicago Bears defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.