The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson catches 2 balls for 11 yards and a nice hug from a referee.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.
- Parkinson scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
85%POTENCY
-16.1PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A single Bears jersey, ironically worn
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Parkinson's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.