The Chip-and-Release Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.
- Parkinson catches 2 balls for 11 yards and a nice hug from a referee.
86%POTENCY
-11.8PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Parkinson, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.