The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“The broadcast shows Parkinson on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.
- Parkinson tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.
76%POTENCY
-17.7PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Parkinson, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.