The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
- Parkinson is targeted on a 3rd-and-17 and gains exactly 16 yards. Punt. Cry.
91%POTENCY
-10.8PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- Powdered kicker confidence
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Parkinson's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.