The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Colby Parkinson
Colby Parkinson · LAR · TE
“Parkinson's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Parkinson's week
- Parkinson runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.
- Parkinson is "week-to-week" in the same way the sun is "day-to-day".
88%POTENCY
-10.5PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Parkinson's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Kyren Williams
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Matthew Stafford
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Blake Corum
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Colby Parkinson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colby Parkinson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colby Parkinson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.