The Hamstring Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.
87%POTENCY
-15.3PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A used challenge flag
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
Goedert, Goedert, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.