The Invisible Route Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.
- Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.
87%POTENCY
-13PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Goedert's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.