The Late Scratch Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert has his best game ever, but it is for the opposing fantasy manager in another league.
- Goedert stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.
73%POTENCY
-10.3PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Goedert's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.