The Mystery Tweak Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- A localized thunderstorm forms over Goedert's stadium. Only over Goedert.
- Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.
76%POTENCY
-12.3PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Goedert, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.