The Invisible Route Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert gets a 40-yard pass, then immediately "adjusts his gloves" and is injured. Tragic.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
- Goedert scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
80%POTENCY
-9PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
Incantation
Goedert, Goedert, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.