The Hamstring Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of South Dakota State's biggest rival.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- Goedert gets a "catch" that is overturned. Then another. The ref is now his nemesis.
- Goedert runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.
77%POTENCY
-9.4PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Goedert's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.