The Phantom Flag Hex of Dallas Goedert
Dallas Goedert · PHI · TE
“Goedert stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Goedert's week
- A localized thunderstorm forms over Goedert's stadium. Only over Goedert.
- Goedert will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
73%POTENCY
-14.8PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Goedert, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Dallas Goedert in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dallas Goedert is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dallas Goedert actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.