The Blocking Assignment Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- Stowers tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.
- Stowers stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.
89%POTENCY
-15.4PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single Steelers jersey, ironically worn
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- Powdered kicker confidence
Incantation
Stowers, Stowers, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.