The Red-Zone Ghost Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Stowers scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.
- Stowers gets a 40-yard pass, then immediately "adjusts his gloves" and is injured. Tragic.
74%POTENCY
-19.3PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Stowers, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.