The Late Scratch Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- Stowers runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.
- Stowers catches 2 balls for 11 yards and a nice hug from a referee.
73%POTENCY
-19.3PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
Incantation
Stowers, Stowers, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.