The Sunday Night Fade Hex of Eli Stowers
Eli Stowers · PHI · TE
“Stowers's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Stowers's week
- Stowers gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
- Rookie Stowers gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.
86%POTENCY
-10.6PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Chiefs locker room
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Stowers's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- DeVonta Smith
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Eli Stowers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Eli Stowers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Eli Stowers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.