The Shank Hex of Jake Elliott
Jake Elliott · PHI · K
“Elliott will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Elliott's week
- Elliott attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.
- Elliott is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.
92%POTENCY
-14.4PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
Elliott, Elliott, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Saquon Barkley
- DeVonta Smith
- Brandon Aubrey
- Makai Lemon
- Dallas Goedert
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Eli Stowers
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Elliott in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Elliott is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Elliott actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.