The Doink Hex of Jason Myers
Jason Myers · SEA · K
“At 35, Myers is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Myers's week
- The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Myers is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.
- Myers attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.
78%POTENCY
-10.4PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Myers's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Jadarian Price
- Brandon Aubrey
- Sam Darnold
- Zach Charbonnet
- Cameron Dicker
- AJ Barner
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Rashid Shaheed
- Chris Boswell
FAQ
How do I curse Jason Myers in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jason Myers is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jason Myers actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.