The Chip-and-Release Hex of Jelani Woods
Jelani Woods · NYJ · TE
“Woods finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Woods's week
- Woods spikes the ball in celebration at the 3-yard line. He was not in the end zone.
- Woods gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Virginia's biggest rival.
84%POTENCY
-13.6PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Woods, Woods, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Breece Hall
- Colston Loveland
- Garrett Wilson
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Jelani Woods in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jelani Woods is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jelani Woods actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.