The Hamstring Hex of Kirk Cousins
Kirk Cousins · MIN · QB
“Cousins's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Cousins's week
- Cousins gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Michigan State's biggest rival.
- At 38, Cousins is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
74%POTENCY
-9.8PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Jets locker room
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Cousins, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Drake Maye
- Justin Jefferson
- Joe Burrow
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Kirk Cousins in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kirk Cousins is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kirk Cousins actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.