The Hamstring Hex of New York Giants
New York Giants defense
“The Giants defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins New York Giants defense's week
- The Giants defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.
- The Giants defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.
82%POTENCY
-12.8PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single tear from a Texans fan
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Giants's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Malik Nabers
- Cam Skattebo
- Isaiah Likely
- Theo Johnson
- Darnell Mooney
- Malachi Fields
- J.J. McCarthy
- Dominic Zvada
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
FAQ
How do I curse New York Giants defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If New York Giants defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing New York Giants defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.