The Doink Hex of Ryan Fitzgerald
Ryan Fitzgerald · CAR · K
“Fitzgerald gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Florida State's biggest rival.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Fitzgerald's week
- Fitzgerald will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Fitzgerald gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
73%POTENCY
-18.1PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Fitzgerald's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Ryan Fitzgerald in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ryan Fitzgerald is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ryan Fitzgerald actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.