The Doink Hex of Ryan Fitzgerald
Ryan Fitzgerald · CAR · K
“Fitzgerald is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Fitzgerald's week
- Fitzgerald gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- Fitzgerald gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
77%POTENCY
-9.2PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Fitzgerald's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Ryan Fitzgerald in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ryan Fitzgerald is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ryan Fitzgerald actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.